DEEP WATERS

I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But... This holiday season, it seems I just keep hearing about one sad situation after another. Here's a sampling of a few: A teen girl struggling with life-altering anxiety and depression A young mom of two beginning chemotherapy after undergoing a double mastectomy A mom of two adopted kids out of work and facing the threat of homelessness And the very worst of all... The mama whose mental illness and hopelessness led her to take her own life - just weeks before Christmas. The holidays can be a wonderful time filled with faith, family and fun.  The holidays can also be a difficult time, a time when problems magnify, at least in our own minds.   What makes matters worst is that it's also a time we assume we should be happy and joyful. After all, Christmas is a time that we celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior. We sing... Joy to the World, the Lord is come! Let earth receive her King! We sing beautifu...

I've been thinking about one word a lot recently... LEGACY. My thoughts can be traced to a recent event in my life. This past week I spent time in my hometown of Baltimore, Maryland. I traveled home for my Uncle Alvis's funeral on this past Monday. His funeral was one of the most precious I've ever attended. The room was filled with people whose lives have been touched one way or another by Uncle Alvis. Family members, colleagues, neighbors, fellow church members -- we all crammed into his A.M.E. (African Methodist Episcopal) church home to reminisce and illuminate a life fully lived. My uncle spent his life serving college students as a professor in the School of Social Work at Howard University in Washington D.C. (my alma mater, by the way - HU!!!). As the president of Allen University in Columbia, South Carolina for a short time. As a member of the peace corps in Liberia, West Africa (which my family and I visited when I was only 4 years old). As a social activis...

When I first began writing regular posts about my parents , it was easy to find the time and energy to write. I would sit down at my laptop, and before I knew it I'd pecked out some sincere and, I hope, honoring thoughts about each of them. But that was back when my parents were still with us. But TODAY I feel like I have to write... Today is the anniversary of the day my mother passed away. I can hardly believe it's been a whole year. Then on the other hand, it feels like a lifetime ago that my sisters and I walked up and down the halls of my parents' hospitals. It feels like a lifetime ago that I spent weeks at a time in Maryland, sitting beside my parents' hospital beds, talking with nurses and doctors about my parents' prognoses. It seems like a lifetime ago that I was hopeful that my mother might actually recover, especially when her health miraculously improved. It seems like a lifetime ago that I prayed she'd someday return home. Little did ...

When I reflect on my family's recent relocation back to Tennessee, I think of all that moving brings. Change. Excitement. Intrigue.  Moving can be a really cool "reset button"... Giving us the opportunity to begin again, experience a season of renewal, reinvent ourselves even. I've experienced all these joys since we've moved back to Tennessee. Some days I'm overwhelmed with the blessing of moving to a city we love and reconnecting with precious friends we made during our first season in Franklin. An added bonus: we've been blessed to meet new friends and begin jobs with wonderful ministries - New Hope Academy for me and Nashville Rescue Mission for Anthony. But moving has another side... Like almost any other major change it brings a whole other list of things. Stress. Disorientation. Grief. Along with the reset button of relocation comes the reminder of all the wonderful things and people we left behind in Arkansas - and in Northern Virg...

Kalin, Anthony and Me in front of Kalin's MTSU dorm It's the day after we dropped my first-born Kalin off at college.  I'm a little sad. (My baby boy has grown up and started a new season away from the nest.) I'm a little bewildered. (How is that my baby boy has grown up so quickly?) I'm a little nervous. (He's on a huge campus. Will he make it to all of his classes on time? Will he study hard? Will he eat at least one real meal today?) But mostly I am very grateful.  I'm grateful that I know Kalin was ready to be launched to college. (Oh sure -- he barely cleans his room; stays up way too late watching movies, writing lyrics and dropping beats; and sleeps in as late as humanly possible in the morning...)  Yet I think of my red-headed boy today and see a mature, responsible young man who's had a clear direction in life for many, many years now. I see a young man who studies well, reads ravenously and takes school seriously. I see a yo...

My Mom with former Baltimore Mayor & State's Attorney Kurt Schmoke  I haven't shared much here recently. While the whirlwind of my life has slowed some, most days I find myself pushing through, working through fatigue and grief. I haven't even spoken about the upheaval in my hometown of Baltimore, Maryland. My hometown that I still love deeply. I've watched lots of footage. I've had several conversations. I have many, many thoughts.  I just haven't felt led to write about it. And yet life goes on... Tomorrow is Mother's Day, and I'm finding myself experiencing a mixture of emotions. I'm happy to be a Mom. So blessed to have four beautiful, healthy children. Children that amaze me with their multiple gifts and talents. Children that make me laugh until my side hurts. Children that also drive me crazy - almost literally.  Children that God saw fit to bless me with through the miracle of birth and the wonder of adoption. My...

My Mother, A Born Leader I've experienced that moment already... On Saturday, February 21, family and friends joined together to reflect on and celebrate my Mom's life. After a difficult illness and weeks of hospitalization, my Mom passed away on Tuesday, February 10. I was there the day she passed. I'd watched her grow more and more ill throughout her last weeks here.  And yet, the reality of my mother's passing - and my Dad's - is taking a while to sink in. I've even experienced that moment already... That moment when something happens or something is said or I see something interesting, and I think,  I can't wait to tell Mommy about this. The first time was immediately after her Homegoing Celebration.  We'd laughed. We'd cried. We'd reminisced. And I believe we presented my mother with a service that she would have felt honored to witness. I think she would have been quite pleased. I think she also would have been am...

When I wrote my last post a week ago, I had no idea I was about to lose my father. He appeared to be getting better, had begun pulling out from his post operative delirium and had begun talking again. He'd even begun telling others that he wanted my mother moved to his hospital room "to talk business." Well, my Daddy's business now is spending time with Jesus and all the loved ones that beat him to heaven... I wanted to write this post to share just a bit about my Dad and what he meant to me. A dear friend said it so well in a text to me today... "He was a smart, loving, funny, warm and generous man. Oh and good looking!"  Anyone who knew him would have used the same words to describe him. Even the hospital staff adored him. They called him "Mr. Carl", and in a Baltimore accent, it sounded more like "Mr. Cawl." We all loved him. But God loved him more. So He decided to take him Home. I'm so grateful for the 45 years ...

The news is buzzing once again about a life cut short.  Yesterday, 63-year-old actor-comedian Robin Williams was found dead in his California hom e. In a public statement, the Marin County sheriff's office has says that it "suspects the death to be a suicide due to asphyxia ."  They have begun an investigation to determine the official cause of death, but I am already saddened by the possibility... For decades I've enjoyed the talent of Robin Williams. I was introduced to him way back in 19 - shhhh... when he starred in the silly sitcom  Mork and Mindy . I smile when I think of that crazy outer space greeting, "Nanoo, nanoo". I also loved his movies - Good Morning, Vietnam , Dead Poets Society , Mrs. Doubtfire , and Good Will Hunting . Robin Williams was a rare find - a comedian that could also handle his business in a dramatic role. Like the role of Sean Maguire, a Boston-based college professor in Good Will Hunting .  I ...