Friday, July 8, 2011

Day 8: It's All About Him


In church Sunday, God brought me to my knees. We were in the middle of worship, and the worship team began singing "I Give Myself Away." Suddenly, lifting my hands and singing along wasn't enough. So I dropped to my knees, overwhelmed with the message of the song.

I give myself away
I give myself away so You can use me
I give myself away
I give myself away so You can use me...


Now to understand what brought me to my knees, I need to give you a little backstory. For the last few days I had been grumbling to myself, to God and to anyone else that would listen about my list of woes. I was tired. I was tired of church-planting. I was tired of being a pastor's wife. I was tired of others around me.

You see, some days I just want to walk into a ten-year old church, full of a few hundred members (that's not asking for much, right?), sit in my seat and enjoy a dynamic worship experience. It would be awesome to have all the kinks worked out. It would be amazing if we could all serve in the ministries we're passionate about, instead of serving in the ministries we're needed in. It would be cool to mention our church's name, and have people nod knowingly, having at least heard of the church.

But that's not the reality I live in today. And I had entered church Sunday feeling pretty weary over it.

Are there situations in your life that you're weary about today? Has illness or a health concern complicated your life? Are you frustrated with your husband, your kids, an extended family member? Is your job wearing you down? Do you feel like you just might scream your head off if something doesn't change, and change fast?

You're not alone. I've been there. I was there on Sunday morning. And then God spoke to me. He reminded me that my life didn't really belong to me. My life is His life. He reminded me that life really isn't about me anyway.

Rick Warren's New York Times Bestseller, The Purpose-Driven Life, took the publishing world by storm. As I stated in Day 1, people crave purpose, and this is evidenced in the over 30 million copies of Warren's book that have sold worldwide. (That's a dated estimate, by the way.) I think the most profound message of this book can be found in the first sentence of the first chapter.

"It's not about you."

Now let's personalize that. Say it with me. "It's not about me." Again. "It's not about me." One more time so we can really believe it. "It's not about me."

As I bowed humbly before my God, listening to "I Give Myself Away" while I silently prayed, I felt like I could really see. I could see that God loved me so much. I could see that I was right in the middle of His perfect will for me. I could see that He had a plan, and that it's a good one. I could see my PURPOSE lined directly up with His.

And I could see Jeremiah 29:11... "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Now for the bridge of "I Give Myself Away":

My life is not my own
To You I belong
I give myself
I give myself to you

I'm giving myself away to exchange my Purpose for His. What about you?

Purposed For Him,

Carla

To view a video of "I Give Myself Away": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4v5IXbEauMww)

10 comments:

  1. I am so glad you too have submitted yourself to be used by the Master. Love you lots! and I am enjoying your blog.
    Ephesians 3:14-21, "For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen."

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  2. I've been thinking about that a lot lately... "it's not about me" why is that such a hard lesson to learn? Thanks for your words. Love you.

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  3. Kelly, thank you for your blessing over me, Sister. You have encouraged me far more than I could have encouraged you! Love you much.

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  4. Monique, thanks so much for reading my post and encouraging me on a day that you've got so much going on. I love you Girl!

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  5. Your words speak volumes to me today! Thanks for sharing!

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  6. Wow, powerful. I love your honesty because I think many people have the false idea that those "working in the ministry" have such grand lives and everything is fabulous everyday. Such a good post.

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  7. Thanks Sheryl and Chelle! I appreciate your words of encouragement. Yes, Michelle, that's a "false idea" indeed! :-)

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  8. Had that chorus on my head after church last week and now I saw the video. Knowing my head, I will be replaying it in my subconscious as I sleep. Thanks for including links here. I am not very "computer drawned" (or whatever), but I have REALLY enjoyed clicking at the documentary for "Soul Cravings" (more than once, and have passed it on too), and then this video clip of "I Give Myself Away!". It is really coming at the best time for me. Thank you. Not a mere coincidence; it's all staged by The Master, I can feel it!

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  9. Thanks Zarina! I put those links on the blog and wonder: will anyone care? Thanks for letting me know you do and that they are ministering you as well.

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  10. Carla,
    I got a late start reading your blog. I went back and started with day 1--and I'm so glad I did. Wow! I find it so easy to connect and relate to your posts (that shouldn't be a surprise). However something keeps pushing me to deeper reflection. As a result I'm struck by how certain I am (retrospectively) that God was ushering me through Door #1, yet I contined to choose Door #3 or 4. Through my personal actions I have graciously acknowleged God, respected His moral code, and even invited Him to dinner, but more often than not I ended things after the first course was served and failed to extend another invitation until I neeeded something. I hope you don't mind the dinner analogy. Imagine the potential relationship if I were to dig deeper, and fully surrender.

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